I am trying to make this blog be about more than losing Mama. I want to be more like she was. Jonathan and I have decided to be Foster parents. We have thought about it for a long time and we are trying to get started. I've been calling the past couple of weeks to try to get started but the lady that I need to talk to is on vacation. It's frustrating! :) Now that we are ready to go down this road we are ready to get started! I am very thankful that this was in my heart and on my mind before Mama died. She already gave me so much advice on getting started and how to be a foster Mom. She was a great example of it herself. I can't wait to get started. My new goal in life is to follow in her footsteps and use her as an example. She followed Christ in her life. By following her while I follow HIM, I can't go wrong!
In my Bible readings lately, I came across a verse that I absolutely love.
Psalm 113: 9 RSV "He gives the barren woman a home, making her the joyous mother of children. Praise the LORD!"
Today has been an ok day. I've been crying a lot lately and I think my lowest point was calling Daddy yesterday and upsetting him! I thought it would help to talk to him, but I think he was in tears by the end of the conversation. We did have a good talk before I just couldn't choke back that last sob. I stopped crying after I got off the phone with him and I felt so bad for crying to him, of all people. My siblings and I lost the world's greatest Mama, but he lost the world's greatest Wife. I am so sad for him a lot of the times! I called him back to let him know that I was ok, but he sounded a little choked up. I talked to him again today and I think that he was ok. I know that he has had really tough days too and I hate to think that maybe I made it a little harder for him. I know that dealing with her loss will get easier with time, but for right now it is still harder than I thought it would be. We will be ok, though.
No comments:
Post a Comment